Friday, November 27, 2009

What’s on your mind?

Facebook asks me “Whats on your mind?”

Life, Paper, Publication, career, Prioritize, Contact prof, mail, compre, death, Vipassana, Mba, M.S., PS, PS Abroad, Placement, CAT, GRE, G-MAT, Publications for GRE, Work Experience for G-Mat, Civil CDC’s, Am I a quitter? Am I a looser? Wing problems, Who moved my Chivda? Do I love her? Cant manage to read news-paper, A project dat needs to be worked on, Cracked PR T2 – How abt a career in PR? What will she think? P-sentisemite friends, Friends problems, Have not attended a single class post T-1, A NC in HFM? Final CG? Will I cross 8 after graduation? Num-al Pre compre score? T2 marks? Campus Ads, Canada ka prof? A long overdue mail, iTouch, A screwed up Write Up, Fucked up CG, Career in Advertising, Google Reader, Check mail, wassup on Biertijd and Goal..com, El-Classico, Champions League, Test Match Score, Sleep, The thing before Sleep? Do I smell? Bath time? Mess Lite? ANC?, SAC?, Project , Thesis, TIME, Gre Prep, Farewells, 14th Nov, Movie, Songs, Yanni, Washing Clothes, Kidney Stone, Filtered Water, Rising Expenditure, Rising Weight, Its too early to wake up – SNOOZE, When do I get to sleep next? Why didn’t she call me, Start Up, Learn Piano, Search for interns, Camera, lets smoke, lets get wasted, Depression, Bursts of excitement, Why did the BOO me? Was I that bad? Country, Politics, I haven’t read the news paper for the last 2 months, What should I write about? Lazy, Exercise, Why can’t I get a girl? I wanna go abroad, I hate India, However I say it, I ll always love India, Or will I? Do I? When is the Next House Episode coming? I want new music, Will I get placed? PS @ financial institute vss PS at core CIVIL, Do I like Civil, If I leave Technical side, does it mean accepting defeat? Finishing that unread novel, Blog, Should I become a writer/journalist? I think I write well!!! Time to act,

lite!!!

And then the Biggies

What have I achieved so far

What if I fail?

What if I never make it big?

What makes me happy?

What is that field, to which I can devote my entire life’s work to?

What’s my passion?

What’s my dream?

Am I any good?

Are all the things that I believe to be right really right? Or is my life merely based on false assumptions and unrealistic Aims?

Will I be able to fulfil all the promises I have made to myself?????

In serious need of answers, Do write back, Even an ASDF will be good

13 comments:

Nitin Maheshwari said...

dude don't be so depressed...u r not a loser ,u r just confused....for a while just concentrate on ur present(study ur civil CDC's well) ....take some time and think wat ultimately u want to achieve in ur lyf money?? fame?? job satisfaction ??or others ....and then work on that path....btw who is she whom u love ?? and wat happened on 14th nov ???

Vineet Pandey said...

I know you since 4 months, you are not a loser. Stop thinking, comprees might just be the best way to do that. ATB!

Do the smallest of things that make you happy and then you can always find the strength you need to take on challenges of your own. Btw, I'm highly doubtful the clarity you are looking for ever comes, hope I'm wrong though.

Kaushal.... said...

Chill be...I guess everyone is facing the same set of questions....

Experimenter said...

i guess its kinda wrng is sm1 isnt so confused at this age :)

Apoorv Bapat said...

@all
Don't read much into it. Its just a post. Although I must acknowledge, I have never been so confused.

And I am pretty sure, u all must also be having these bursts of Self doubt, and all you need is a small token of success to set u back on track....

Abhay said...

Nice post...
Having a similar state of mind these days....

Prasad Mahajan said...

As I know you,I think I have answers to some of your questions...

Am I a quitter?Am I a looser?
Ans: You are. You Wont be!
... See More
Do I love her?
Ans: I think,Yes! You would make a great Couple...

What will she think?
Ans: Why Do you care?...Remember " Frankly My Dear, I dont Care..."

Fucked up CG...
Ans: No Comment!

Why didn’t she call me?
Ans: When was the last time you called her?

Start Up?
Ans:Wait...

lets smoke, lets get wasted,
Ans: I will Kick Your ASS...And if you ever smoke, i will insert that burning piece into your @#$^&%%#.....

Do I smell?
Ans: You Do...Bath regularly!

Depression....
Ans: You are not alone...

Vipassana
Ans: Nice move...

What if I never make it big?
Ans: You will learn 1000 new things trying that will make you better person...

Rising Weight...
Ans: Exercise!

Why did they BOO me?
Ans: Because you went to them and asked for their opinion...

Why can’t I get a girl?
Ans: Dude, Hold it Together...Patience...

A screwed up Write Up
Ans: Its the gesture that matters..than the content or presentation...

Who moved my Chivda?
Ans: I DID! Sorry!

What’s my dream?Am I any good?
Ans: You are alone in that buddy...Nobody can help in that...Figure it out yourself...

Will I be able to fulfil all the promises I have made to myself?????
Ans: Wait for it...Life is AwEsOmE...It will unveil itself...

N Pavan Kumar said...

nice post.
i nearly feel the same ...
:|

@
Prasad mahajan ....
nice... :)
-N Pavan Kumar

aditya said...

गंजल्या ओठास माझ्या धार वज्राची मिळू दे !
आंधळ्या आत्म्यात माझ्या सूर्य सत्याचा जळू दे

http://www.aathavanitli-gani.com/Song%20Html/579.htm

On a serious note...look within!

@Vipassana-- igatpuri anytime?

vineethsp said...

I know you since 5th grade... U aren't a loser.. coz if u were a one then you wouldn't hav had recieved so much replies..
see wat u've earned... a hell lot of friends... and you call urself a loser..??

Apoorv Bapat said...

@all....
Please dont read much into the looser part. Its just a sudden burst of Self Doubt after a bad day at work....

And its just a post... I am pretty much sound and OK.

The post is just a means to Address all the confusion

mk said...

I've never been the one with long talks. So just three things:
1. We should hang out more.
2. If you don't want us to read much into this, stop letting the word out.
3. And Yanni, seriously?
:P

Apoorv Bapat said...

A clarification
The desperate cry for help might have made you feel that I have completely lost my balance and have given up hope. Actually, as I realised, It was a desperate cry, not for individual answers to each of my problems but for a way to handle these problems. Ironically, the answer is right there in the post... It was Vipassana. It has helped me a lot and most importantly given me a way to tackle the rest of the problems.

Any ways, thanks to all my wellwishers for you concerened and encouraging replies.....